What Would Aunties Say? – A Review

by Sonaili Vasta

The book has taken South Asian social media by storm over the past few weeks. Written by popular British content creator and influencer Anchal Seda, it is a must-have for every brown girl.

What would aunties say? Offers advice to South Asian girls who are trying to navigate the murky waters of discovering themselves under the watchful eyes of community aunties. 

The topics explored range from colorism to mental health to interracial relationships, and through these Anchal hopes to “encourage brown girls worldwide to go against the grain, educate the older generations, dismantle stereotypes and shake up some of the old-school auntie attitudes”. 

These topics are already taboo to talk about, but Anchal began delving into them in a podcast after the book’s namesake.

Aunties in South Asian culture are often looked down upon by the younger generations for their judging comments and glares. However, Anchal humanises them. The writing provides an insight into their thinking which although outdated, comes from a place mixed with care and unhealed past trauma.

Each aunty is different and deals with their own issues. This is also the same for every South Asian girl as all of them are juggling coming to terms with finding their footing in a world filled with stereotypes and high expectations. Anchal labels the different types of aunties and brown girls in a humorous and warm way.

The book helps find a middle ground for both Aunties and young South Asian girls whilst challenging them both to question the toxic environment that may surround them.

Although it is not specifically mentioned, one may question whether both parties are somehow victims of the primitive patriarchal society that has been filtered down through generations.

When I first picked up this book, I had my doubts as I found myself wondering what it will tell me that I do not already know. At the end of the day, I am a brown girl who is trying to be myself and live my best life. When I saw the book blowing up all over social media, I was happy that Anchal was getting all the success she deserves but I did not think that the book would be for me.

However, being the basic brown girl I am, I set off to buy it. I wanted a signed copy as well and spent a while hunting through London for one. The lack of them showed how they had sold like hotcakes, but I eventually found one. 

As soon as I began reading it, I could not put it down. It really is a page turner and I have learnt so much from it that I did not already know. It is also reassuring to know that so many other girls have faced some of the battles and that the ‘log kya kahenge’ mentality will always form a foundation that unites us. Also, there was something magical about seeing all these identity crises and internal thoughts coming to life through the words littered across the pages. 

Overall, ‘what would aunties say?’ really is a brown girl’s guide to being yourself and living your life to the fullest. Anchal has really put herself out there and paved the way for brown girls to continue the conversation.